With 46 years of marriage, and counting, John and Cecilia Perfect, say love, friendship and God are a sure fire recipe for long-lasting love.
Having met on 11 May 1974, the Perfects still celebrate their love for each other every day. John said he met his wife at work and just knew that she was the one for him. He said: “It all started with a dinner-dance and a year later we got engaged. The following year, on 15 May 1976, we got married and I have never loved any other woman more than I first loved Cecilia.” John said three months into the marriage, he joined the South African Defence Force and had to leave his new wife behind, before their honeymoon. Being away from her husband during the honeymoon phase of the marriage, Cecilia said it was the hardest time of their lives. “I had to be strong and understand that if he did not go, he could get arrested. I waited and just when he was about to come back, I was already regretting why I was married to him,” she said.
Cecilia said that with the support of her family and two books, they were able to rekindle their love. “I bought two books, which I recommend young couples should read, ‘The Act of Marriage’ by Tayari Jones and ‘Intended Pleasure’ by Ed Wheat. Both the books helped us get through everything we were going through, bringing back the spark into our marriage,” said Cecilia. She said the books taught them that their love for one another is not negotiable. John agreed and said that “everything, from what we will eat to where we will go and what we will cook, can be negotiated but not our love and friendship”. John said as a Christian couple, they believe in what the bible says, especially the story about the three-threaded rope. “We believe that the only person we can let in our relationship is God. There may be times we do not like each other, but the bible does not speak about liking, it speaks about love and that is what we have,” John added.
He said celebrating Valentine’s Day should not be a one-day affair but an everyday thing. “I always surprise my wife, not just on Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day is no surprise, everyone knows the 14th of February. I sometime make her cards, with poems from my heart, and that is extra special. To date, we have kept all those cards.” John said nowadays young couples don’t buy flowers and chocolates for their girlfriends but airtime and data instead. The couple advised young couples to always put love and friendship first in their relationships. “It’s not about the first date, engagement or your wedding day as it does not promise you 46 years of your life together. It’s all about understanding each other’s needs, communication, compromising and always knowing when to say ‘I am sorry’. “It’s also not about money as long as you love and appreciate one another and allow God to be in control, your love will prosper. Happy Valentine’s Day and month to all the lovely couples out there,” said the Perfects.
