Conscious Living with Krsangi Radhe

The key to unlocking many relationship barriers is communication. We sometimes get caught up in misunderstanding or in a chain of ‘broken communication’ where the sender, sends out a message that maybe unclear or perhaps even distorted by the noise or interference around us.

What do I mean by this?

For instance, in a marriage, the husband maybe consumed in his busy work life, without focussing on assisting or being present in the home. The wife does not know how to raise this matter, and drops hints every now and then, instead of  being straight-forward and requesting that he be engages more in household responsibilities. This causes confusion, and leads to the ‘broken telephone’ syndrome in the relationship.

Speak your mind and be mindful of what you are saying
This can work as a double-edge swords, but more often than not – it leads to clearing out the air. Communicating directly instead of just dropping hints or remarks every now and then causes confusion. When hints it is a constant note – it can become an irritation and eventually the person hinting is viewed as a ‘nag’. Tension mounts, and this leads to more serious problems.

Although clear communication is imperative in healthy relationships, we also need to be mindful in the manner in which we tackle sensitive issues. Think about an appropriate time to speak about the issue that is troubling, and also reflect on your presentation before blurting out something that you may later regret.

Uttering insensitive words in the midst of a heated argument is never healthy. Never try to make your point during an argument – rather make your point in a tactful yet clear manner when tension dissipates. It is never a bad thing totake the initiative, or the first step to open the communication lines in a relationship. This also shows that you have thought about the matter and willing to make amends. By by listening to the other person – do not get defensive – listen. Use this opportunity to understand your partner, and offer ways in which you can also help the situation.

Don’t focus on the bad
By offering power to negativity and ill emotions, you will be fuelling that particular flame.

Friendships and relationships are there to connect with each other. It was
meant to ease the pressures faced by the outside world, a place where ‘someone has your back’. Harbouring negative emotions will just cause a whirl-wind affect and you will eventually carry the pain and hurt. By holding on to negativity, you will be weighed down by it.

Stay positive
Personal, close relationships are the building blocks to a happy existence. Ultimately a deep look at oneself is necessary in order to help solve relationships problems. Communication with an intent to help the situation is key.

Stay positive and that energy will assist in enhancing the relationship. Leave the noise (external interference) out of close relationships. Focus on what matters, and who matters. Invest in creating harmonious relationships with those that you hold de ar, and it will be a natural tendency for attract reciprocation.

The key to any relationship is communication. This is the ingredient that will either allow the relationship to live or die. If the relationship is important to you, invest in being more mindful of opening up the channels of communication.

Never underestimate the power of this ‘silent’ tool.

About the columnist:
Krsangi Radhe is a public relations practitioner, educator, entrepreneur
and motivational speaker.
Visit her blog: www.vearth.org.za